Monday, 26 September 2016

MusicMonday - Song Of The Week: 'Dirrty' by Christina Aguilera

I'm sorry to have to go for another advert, but this has officially been stuck in my head at every turn.

I haven't been a fan of Christina Aguilera for several years. Not since she drunkenly lost her mind and forgot where she came from, or who inspired her to get where is, and in turn, started disrespecting such people on the record. Before that time however, I still was akin to her vocally idiosyncratic ways, even if they were becoming increasingly overshadowed by the dwindling morality of her video persona.

I bring your attention to the point where she clearly lost the plot (if not her knicker elastic). 'Dirrty' has been adopted as the theme song for #EpicSquads; the latest instalment in the insurance battle adverts for The Builders vs. The Strutters. It's highly disturbing to say the least, and I'm sure that nobody saw the adverts going this far all those months ago, when Sharon 'Mrs O' Osborne attested to just how 'MoneySupermarket' the original strutter really was. But here we are in present day, cackling over a rotund black man in some 'booty shorts' that are (thankfully) not that short, with some platform heels that he clearly cannot walk in, despite what I'm sure must be a triple 'E' fitting; and a rather slim Caucasian man in matching attire, save for some suspenders under his blazer; and the only question that comes to mind is: Has anybody shown this to Aguilera?

Here for you while we ponder, is the Director's Cut...

I think that we can all agree that that's not a street that you want to take a trip down anytime soon. I remember discussing the original with one of my Carers, who told me that her 7-year-old son asked her why the man on the TV was dressed like a woman...I didn't envy her the task of answering that question then; and I certainly don't relish the task now...all I can do is wish her well and say #GoodLuckWithThat.

On the flipside, the original video caused enough of a scandal as it was - it must just go with the song. I remember the video making the news, and women's rights campaigners the world over - coming out of the woodwork to condemn the song and the singer for setting us back decades, by reducing women to sexual objects for men to ogle at. I specifically remember one campaigner calling out the dance move, where Aguilera grinds down low and splits her legs open so that her underwear can be seen. I also remember being in agreement with my Mother, who's most positive comment at the time was "at least shes wearing some...even if we can't tell how many days old they are". Never a truer word spoken,'s the original from her 'Xtina' days, featuring chaps-wearing debauchery...I mean, Redman:

And there you have it - another mindsplitting Song Of The Week has been heralded. Don't tell me that you haven't found yourself going around humming it since the advert went viral, because I simply won't believe you; the song itself is a brilliant floorfiller - but at least now you have an excuse...for another six days at any rate.

Until the next...